PORTLAND (NEWS CENTER Maine) -- Getting over hurt is not easy. If we choose to involve ourselves with other humans we will, inevitably, have to deal with some pain. Licensed marriage and family therapist Jack Burke shares five strategies for healing.
- Manage your EGO when It says things like, "She can't treat ME like that!" or "How dare he!"
- Practice ACCEPTANCE. It really happened. It really hurts. This is something we can do alone in the woods or our spiritual place. Talking with others can also be an important part of this for many. This will require whatever time you need. We don't all adjust at the same speed.
- POSITIVE VS. NEGATIVE decision making. Examples of negative decision making: you decide you will never be lied to again; you check your partner's cell and email; you stay alert. With this type of behavior, you never get relief. With positive decision making, you decide you will always have the truth; you can be successful; you can have relief.
- Utilize RITUALS/SYMBOLS. Funerals, memorials, ceremonies help us recognize the emotion. We can do rituals with others or by ourselves.
- There are specific THERAPIES (EMDR for example) that have been very effective in relieving people from painful memories/experiences.
