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THERAPY THURSDAY | Family memories

Do you worry that your kids have been scarred by your parenting 'mistakes?' There's one way to find out. When they're old enough, just ask.
Credit: NEWS CENTER Maine
Sharon Rose Vaznis turns the tables on Jack Burke during his Therapy Thursday segment by sharing a story about parenting

PORTLAND (NEWS CENTER Maine) -- A big reason why parenting is so hard is because of our propensity for perpetual self-evaluation. And it's not always flattering.

To illustrate the absurdity of this mindset, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist Jack Burke created an imaginary scenario in which business managers are trained along the same lines. Everything that goes right in the office is credited to the gifted workers. Everything that goes wrong is the fault of management. And as a parent, you take on that burden for free!

A parent can drive to at least 1,000 basketball practices, make hundreds of costumes for dance recitals, and be there every step of the way for their child...and yet, still be tortured with guilt for that ONE proverbial missed game or performance. For sure (so the thinking goes), that one error will be all the kids remember and the source of all their trouble in life.

Or maybe not!

How interesting would it be to find out that our kids might not even have that memory? Or maybe they have memories that we have forgotten.

In this segment of Therapy Thursday, Jack talks about the burden parents carry around to be perfect, the different ways family members can recall the same incident, and the power of clearing the air and letting it go.

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